hypnobirthing for caesarean birth

The focus of traditional hypnobirthing methods has always been natural birth – avoiding any unnecessary interventions  - and it does work amazingly well for many women – giving them the confidence they need to request more time to birth naturally and the calm and relaxation that help to reduce the need for pain relief and shorten labour.  The sticking point for me has always been those occasions where the only choice for a woman, to ensure the safety and well-being of herself and her baby, is to opt for a caesarean birth – this is where the traditional hypnobirthing method might fail the women that it aims to help.  A footling breech that just won’t budge, placenta praevia, extreme polyhydramnios - these are all situations in which, whilst a woman could achieve a natural birth, she would probably not want to take the risk.  Utmost in every mother’s mind is the health of her baby and there has to come a point at which caesarean birth becomes the safer option. 

So where does this leave a woman who has done a hypnobirthing course – who has been told that natural birth is the only kind and gentle option for her baby, that intervention is never good and is then told by medical professionals that to have a natural birth would be risking her own life and that of her child.  Do we leave her to feel like a failure, to feel abandoned, to feel like all her preparation has been in vain?  I doubt any practitioner would want to leave their clients feeling this way.

This is why it is so important that hypnobirthing practitioners are able to support caesarean birth and important for the mothers that they work with to know that they will be fully supported no matter what the outcome of their birth. When a mother opts for a caesarean it does not mean she will not experience any of the fear and concern associated with natural birth – far from it  - she is just as vulnerable, if not more so, to the fear of the unknown, along with the potential disappointment associated with not having the birth that she had originally wanted.   What she wants, like any new mother, is to be able to enjoy her birth, to remember the birth of her new baby as a happy event, free of trauma.

Happily, hypnobirthing and other mind-body techniques have a huge amount to offer mothers and their babies when it comes to caesarean birth.  Releasing all fears, concerns and disappointments; using the breath to relax, be in the moment and remain perfectly still; having the confidence to request what you want from your caesarean birth – a calm and quiet room, delayed cord clamping, skin-to-skin with your baby; preparation for a quick and straightforward recovery; the knowledge and reassurance that you have made all the right decisions for yourself and your baby.  So there is a way for new mothers to have the birth that they want for their baby, to enjoy their birth and have a caesarean.  As one hypnobirthing mum said of her caesarean birth ‘It was truly magical’ – Cathy on the birth of baby Hugo.

The Most Incredible Week (Including the birth of Nancy Rose Lyall)

Last week may well have been one of the most incredible weeks of my life.  Not least because of the serendipity of each event that took place and the way that it has contributed to a complete sense of congruence associated with the changes I am making in my life.   

Monday

Today I taught my last psychology lessons.  I was touched by some of the ways in which my students said their goodbyes.  One of them gave me this which she had drawn herself (admittedly in lieu of catch up work that I had given her after she missed one of my lessons)

 

With the backdrop of Kate Middleton’s seemingly straightforward and natural birth to the prince George today my move seems to have happened at just the right time – hypnobirthing seems to be coming more and more into the public consciousness and Kate’s birth stands testament to the fact that even under the most medical of conditions (she had two gynaecologists attending her birth and no midwife) a straightforward, relaxed and natural birth is always possible.

Tuesday

Today was the last day of college and I took the opportunity to say goodbye to my colleagues and friends of the last 11 years.  As is the custom in state schools in the UK, the afternoon of the last day of the summer term was devoted to at least 2 hours of speeches for and from those who were leaving for retirement or for new adventures.  Incredibly there were more than 15 members of staff leaving, moving jobs or going on sabbatical.  Everyone managed to keep their speeches short and by 3pm I was able to go and finish packing up all my boxes and moving out of my classroom and office space.  Things started to look very real at this point – and a little scary.

However, on my arrival home I found on the doorstep the first (I hope of many) deposit and booking form for my new brand of hypnobirthing classes.  With my leaving cards read and flowers put in vases I quietly began a new chapter of my life…with a very broad smile on my face.

 

Wednesday

With the boys dropped off for their last day of school and nursery before the summer holidays Darren and I were left with ‘nothing’ to do today.  I don’t think we have had one day like this in the last 5 years, where we have had the opportunity to decide what we wanted to do together, just the two of us, so we decided to make the most of it.  We went to the spa, ahhhh.  Looking back this was the best possible thing we could have done.  Had I known what the next few days would hold I would not have changed a thing.  Those hours of complete relaxation were the perfect preparation for what came next.

That night I got the call that I had been anticipating for weeks.  Some months ago my best friend, Cathy, had asked me to be her birthing partner (along with her husband Rik) for the birth of her second baby.  Now she was telling me she had gone into labour and to expect a call in the next few hours asking me to come round.

Just an hour or so later Rik called to ask me to come over.  My heart was in my mouth as I drove the 10 minutes to Cathy’s house but when I arrived Cathy was calm, prepared and very excited about meeting her baby.  She was managing her surges well and seemed very relaxed.  Just as she had learned in her hypnobirthing refresher – she started trying different techniques to manage her surges, breathing through them, moving and walking them through and trying out different forms of massage and pressure points.  We enjoyed some fun moments together laughing about how we would bring this baby into the world.

Thursday

As the night wore on Cathy got increasingly more tired and was reluctant to lie down as the surges were more painful that way.  Rik and I took it in turns to go for a rest and Cathy continued to try and bring the labour on.  Eventually though she was too tired to stay up any longer and went to bed to try and rest and get her energy back.  Just half an hour later she woke up feeling like she must have done something wrong.  She hadn’t felt any surges in the time she’d been sleeping and the baby had stopped moving.  Baby was having a rest we tried to tell her but it took a call to the midwife to reassure her.  Although initially panic stricken she began to realise that this was normal for a first labour (she had had an elective c-section with Hugo, her first baby, as he was breech) and quickly regained her calm composure.  She had a short sleep as I did a fear release hypnosis with her and went on to prepare herself for a day of rest and natural labour induction.

I went home before Hugo woke up so that I could get some sleep and prepare myself for the night ahead.  Cathy and Rik packed Hugo off to Granny’s so that they could get some rest and get the labour going.  They got the baby checked out at Frome birthing centre, relaxed, watched a movie, drifted in and out of sleep, and went to the shops for the chocolate digestives that Cathy had been craving all through the previous night.

Friday into Saturday morning

At 1.30am I got another phone call – Cathy was getting surges every five minutes and was ready to go to the hospital.  I was on my way in five minutes flat, nervously anticipating the hours to come but when I got there Cathy was totally in the zone.  I met Rik at the door - he was getting himself busy packing up the car and Cathy was upstairs, sitting on the bed, completely relaxed.  I whispered to her that I was there but I knew that she didn’t need me with her.  ‘This is it’ I thought ‘she’s really ready’. 

The car journey was not particularly comfortable for Cathy but I sat in the back with her and, as per instructions, used the hypnobirthing techniques we’d discussed to help her relax and keep the surges manageable.  We couldn’t believe the road to the hospital was closed off due to roadworks.  Fortunately the very kind workmen realised what was going on and moved the traffic cones to let us through and finally we were there.

After Cathy was examined (2cm dilated) we were in a dilemma as to whether to stay or go home.  Things had slowed down a little but Cathy decided that we could hang around and see if we could bring the labour on at the hospital and if she’d made no progress when she was examined again then we would go home.  ‘I want those nice strong ones back’ she said about her surges.  We made the day room our home for the next few hours, with Cathy’s electric candles glowing and her affirmations playing with her headphones on.  She was able to walk in the garden outside and used her birthing ball to ease the surges.  As things seemed to progress she used Rik as an anchor to lean against.  I am sure it was the lovely smoochy cuddles they had during that time that brought on the 3 great stonking surges she had just before she was examined for the second time.  Still just 2cms.  Cathy was exhausted and so disappointed – almost ready to give up on herself she clearly needed to go home and rest.  In the car she was practically sleeping and the surges seemed to have all but stopped – allowing her some respite.  She was obviously glad to be home and this time she was determined that she would not be going to the hospital until she really was in established labour.

I left them there for what I thought was a rest but actually turned out to be an increasingly intense journey through labour.  Within half an hour of arriving home Cathy was back in the groove and the surges continued to intensify and get closer together.  I got a call at about 5.30pm to say that Cathy had had some bleeding and was about to be rushed to hospital in an ambulance (the bleeding had already stopped by the time of this phonecall by the way!) and could I meet them at the RUH.  As I had feared the traffic was awful (unlike the empty roads of the previous night)but when I finally arrived at the hospital Cathy was quietly managing her surges on the bed as the baby was being monitored.  The examination revealed that she had progressed, but only to 3-4cms.  As I went in to meet a very relaxed Cathy she related the story of how she had arrived in the ambulance – ‘you would have laughed’ she said ‘I was screaming like something out of ‘one born every minute’.  It was horrible at the time but I can only laugh about it now!’. 

Cathy spent the next few hours totally in the zone.  Through trial and error we found the perfect positions for her to labour through, her body established a rhythm and she was able to move in exactly the right way to try and bring things on.  Whilst she was managing the surges nicely with her breathing she was struggling with intense back pain which was only relieved with pressure.  I spent many hours with my fists thrust in her back and many more hours supporting her, along with Rik, through her surges in a standing squat.  By midnight however, Cathy was clearly struggling to go on – she was drained of energy after labouring for so many days and when the midwife told her that she hadn’t progressed since the last time was examined she asked very clearly and calmly if she could have an epidural. 

This was the best possible decision for Cathy and whilst we did make sure that it was what she really wanted the midwife didn’t hesitate in complying with Cathy’s wishes.  While we waited for the anaesthetist she explained that the back pain and lack of progression was probably due to the baby being in a back-to-back position, ineffectively putting pressure on the cervix and instead causing Cathy pain and prolonging the labour.  This was probably the most difficult time in the whole labour.  Having little energy left to manage her surges and having made the decision to have an epidural there was nothing that we could do but wait until the anaesthetist arrived and help Cathy as much as we could to relax and work through the surges.  She was amazing, she used gas and air throughout but she bravely faced each surge and was able to relax and rest in between.  When the anaesthetist arrived and the epidural started to kick in Cathy was able to rest and even had a little sleep.  I took the opportunity to talk to her unconscious mind and help her to move past whatever was blocking her and preventing the baby from moving into the right position and her labour from progressing.  When the midwife re-examined her some time later she was amazed to find that Cathy was nearly fully dilated. 

She told us that she would be back in about an hour and hopefully Cathy would be able to start pushing.  Rik went for a rest on the mat in the bathroom while I sat with Cathy.  When the midwife returned she told Cathy that she was ready to push. Cathy was able to get up onto her knees and lean over the head of the bed.  She started to breathe the baby down and whilst she made some progress in this position it wasn’t until she was moved onto her back that she was able to move the baby down effectively enough.  In the end Cathy had to push with all her might to bring the baby down – the breathing just wasn’t doing it as she had been numbed somewhat by the epidural – but within about 40 minutes she had pushed her baby out without a nick or tear.  At 4.01 baby Nancy was born and went straight to her mum’s chest for a cuddle.  She was pink and healthy and absolutely gorgeous.  Her heart rate had been steady throughout the labour, thanks to Cathy staying so calm.  Even now, days after her birth, she is happy and laid back, alert and feeding well.

Cathy’s my best friend and I have admired her in so many ways for many years, since I have known her, but I see her strength in a different light now through this experience.  She is a truly exceptional, strong and brave person – as are all women who experience natural labour and birth.  Being with her through her labour has taught me that no matter what decisions you make through your labour there is no right or wrong way to give birth.  Each woman and each labour is different, so every choice that is made, as long as it is made by the woman herself, is what is right for her and her baby.  Whilst Cathy would not have chosen this birth, she does not regret the decisions that she made and the way that things worked out.  Ultimately she brought her baby into the world herself, just as she wanted.  Some women are unable to do that but their experiences are precious all the same and they should be treated as such.  The moment you bring your baby into the world will be one you remember forever - and I will remember this birth forever too.

Saturday

I stayed with Cathy until she had had a bath and was settled in her private room at the hospital.  I was honoured with the task of dressing Nancy for the first time.  There’s nothing quite like holding a brand new baby in your arms.  Once Cathy and Nancy were snuggled up nicely together, ready for a sleep I was happy to be able to go home and sleep myself.  I think I spent most of Saturday in bed or on a post-birth high – both of which were quite blissful.

 

Sunday

Today I was able to share Cathy’s story and some hypnobirthing techniques, at the Frome Homebirth Group, with some expectant mums and other birthing practitioners.  Things started to sink in and I started to consolidate my ambitions to become a doula.  I can’t imagine how I will juggle so many things or how I’ll ever manage to sleep enough between births and classes and looking after my own beautiful boys but I can see now that there’s nothing quite like being there to witness the birth of a new baby.  I guess I’ll start by breathing, relaxing and staying open to new possibilities, ‘whatever path my birthing takes…’

My boy on scARy stORies!

 What began as my attempt to interview my 3 year old about babies and birthing classes (in the true nature of children) turned out to be something completely different.  I wasn't going to use it but watching it back it struck me as a very insightful commentary on the impact of others' birth stories and the media (OBEM) on women's fears surrounding birth...

 

...it's also quite cute!

birth of a business

When my best friend, and business advisor, asked me to be her birthing partner I couldn't help exclaiming, on several occasions, how excited I was to be a part of the birth of her new baby!  On one such occasion she responded that she felt just as excited to be a part of the 'birth' of my business.  That got me thinking - is starting a business really like having a baby?
Sure there have been a few potentially painful moments, like when the quote for the website came through (ouch!) and the hours and hours of intense concentration in the development of my new version of hypnobirthing.  But nothing that a bit of deep breathing and relaxing music couldn't ease (so far).
Many of you will know how long this business has been gestating - waiting for the right moment to burst out into the world.  Now that we are 'nearing completion' the task at hand appears daunting - there is certainly some adrenaline involved in the birth of this business and the common fears that surround the birth of a baby are in no short supply: 'This is going to change my life completely - am I ready for it?'; 'Will I have the skills I need to do a good job?'; 'What if something goes wrong?'.  But interspersed with these fears (and if I'm honest, completely overwhelming them) is the excitement of doing something that feels completely right to me and knowing that I'll have something amazing to show for it after the hard work is done.
Of course, once the 'baby' is here I'll need to let everyone know, start settling in and getting used to a new way of doing things with a strange, new and delightful thing in my life.  I'm sure there will be a few sleepless nights and a lot of surprises that I never would have expected despite all the dreaming and planning.  The rest of the family will have to get used to having something else demanding mummy's attention. I imagine that a new business is quite needy, with a lot of demands on my time and energy, and this is when I will start to realise that the birth is just the beginning, the hard work starts once the business is started.  Sure it gets easier as time goes on.  I nurture the business, the business grows, the business starts to give me something back.  Small things at first, like a little profit or a sense of fulfilment, then altogether much more important things - a sense of purpose and contribution to society and not to mention a little love!